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Getting Along With Your Fiancé While Planning Your
Wedding
By Leah Steenstra
Planning your wedding can be a stressful time in your life.
There is so much to do, difficult family issues to tackle,
as well as financial stresses. All this frustration can take
a toll on your relationship with the one you pledge to spend
your life with. Here are a few ideas to keep the love flowing
between you and your intended.
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Don’t Call Names.
When you’re having a bad day and your fiancé
says something you completely disagree with, there is
a tendency to shoot a few choice words or some "not-so-nice
names". Hold your tongue! These labels do nothing
but create anger and hostility, and will certainly not
help to find a solution over cutting the guest list.
-
Don’t Blame. When
something is wrong, choose your words wisely. It is important
to use words like "I feel" instead of saying
something like "You’re wrong". Don’t
express concerns through blaming and criticizing. Instead,
express your feelings without making the other person
wrong.
-
Listen. Marriage Counselors
agree that the biggest complaint in struggling relationships
is that one partner feels as though the other one isn’t
listening. Stop the pattern before it starts and listen
to your fiancé’s concerns. He or she could
have a very good point that you’d miss if you were
too busy rehearsing a rebuttal.
-
Apologize and Forgive.
So, you made a nasty comment about her mother’s
taste in music. Don’t be so filled up with pride
that you won’t ask for forgiveness. Likewise if
she made the mean or inappropriate comment: accept her
apologies and don’t hold a grudge.
-
Be Thoughtful and Flexible.
Next week you are scheduled to meet with three vendors,
on your fiancé's birthday. While he agreed to attend,
you know he’d much rather go out for dinner. Show
him how much you appreciate him and reschedule some appointments
and plan a fun night out.
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Take a Break. It’s
important for both of you to take a break from wedding
planning. Plan a romantic dinner for two, an afternoon
picnic or a movie. Only one rule applies: Don’t
talk about the wedding plans!
Courtesy USABride www.usabride.com
Brookside Farm is operated by Family
Care Foundation.
All proceeds from weddings support the charity
work of Family Care Foundation, as do car donations. Click
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